Pity Party Anyone?

Well, my GP appointment was a bust. I took in my binder with all my info, test results, articles, symptoms...you name it. The doctor wasn't all that interested. Don't get me wrong, she was a nice lady, but had a very limited knowledge of POTS. I didn't see my normal GP. I don't know why their idiotic staff has such a problem understanding me when I call to make an appointment with Dr. B. You'd think when one calls the office and says, “I'd like to make an appointment with Dr. B”, they would actually make an appointment for you with that particular dr., but no, not the case. OMG, I can't tell you how frustrated I am.

Stick a fork in me, cuz I'm  freakin' DONE!!

 

I went in to get my Xanax refilled, which she did, but then I told her I had some questions about my POTS and recent symptoms. I expressed to her that I don't have many of the "tell-tail" symptoms of POTS other than tachycardia (which by the way, is certainly not my biggest concern). I told her of my suspicions that there might be something else going on, like autoimmune issues and could I be tested for that. She looked at me and told me I didn't have autoimmune issues. I asked her how she knows if I've never been tested for anything. She briefly looked at my last few years of labs (which are all routine labs mind you) and said that something would've shown up on those. She advised me to keep hydrated and cool and reduce my stress. REALLY!? So I told her that I guess I am just destined to live my life feeling crappy every day. She didn't have a response to that. I gave her my neatly typed word document table consisting of all my symptoms, delineated by frequency. She glanced over it and gave it back with no response. When I informed her that I wanted to know what type of POTS I have, that maybe there is a different treatment if only we knew what we were dealing with. She said since I have tachycardia and all other heart tests were normal, it's safe to assume I have POTS. I felt like saying, “No shit Sherlock, my question is what type? She would have none of it. She told me we'd look at my blood work results during the next visit (in 6 months) and go from there. Apparently she missed the part where I've been dealing with this for four years now.

My husband was with me and I was near tears, but held them back. To my surprise, after the visit, instead of saying,  I told you so, you'll just have to live with it, he told me that the next step is to ask our daughter's cardio for a referral to a cardio or EP that specializes in POTS/Dysautonomia (since she recognized it in my daughter by just reading her symptoms).

I feel so done with it all at this point, I don't even know if I want to even consider seeing anyone else. I feel like I will just have to go on pretending that life is just freaking dandy and if I ignore it long enough, it might just go away.

So much for my time and effort in compiling my notebook...

I'm so disgusted, discouraged, disheartened and any other dis word I can think of.

Sorry for the rant, just wanted to get it off my chest. It's beer-thirty here, as far as I'm concerned, and I'm going to have a few and wallow in my self-pity for the rest of the day.