Resolutions

UGH, I do not like this term.

Resolution: “the act of resolving or determining upon an action or course of action, method, procedure, etc.” (Dictionary.com).

The term resolution seems to stink of consistency, or at the very least, the need for consistency. The one thing I am consistent at is INCONSISTENCY!! Well, the good news here is that I am at least consistent with that. I am also fairly consistent with too many commas, parentheses; a plethora of other things including building the world’s largest dust bunny condominium under my bed. Hey…look at that…here I thought I was inconsistent at so many things and it turns out I am consistent in many things, just not things that matter.

I also have to add that I am truly consistent with making resolutions each year; I am also sadly consistent with never following through on even one. Maybe I just like to see them on paper… I will however attempt yet, one more time, to write them down and will make an effort to reach some. Maybe that is my problem; I set myself up for failure each time. Maybe I have too much on my list. Maybe I should just start with: I’ll brush my teeth each morning. Oh…I already do that. OK, maybe I’ll start with…I’ll love Big Handsome for always; poo; I will already do that too… I’m screwed!!

Here are the top ten New Year’s Resolutions via Daily Press:

1.       Diet. This is interesting for someone like me (us). I am rarely hungry and hardly ever have an appetite, so this one is a no-go for me. I would like to, however begin to eat healthier, more fruits/veggies etc., so I guess this can make my list after all.

2.       Quit Smoking. Unfortunately, this does make my list. I am a smoker and do wish to quit. I don’t know if there are any other smokers out there (with chronic illnesses), but it is sooo hard. I must admit that I enjoy it way too much. I would like to see my children graduate, get married and have children, all without the help of oxygen, or worse. This one is going on the list.

3.       Exercise. This is one that I would love to put on the list. I used to run 5+ miles a day (before children). As the years have gone by, so has dwindled the exercise. I know that exercise can be so beneficial and it does make me feel better to some extent. Before I got sick, I was riding my bicycle 9+ miles 5/6 times a week. After I became ill, I had to resort to Wii Fit. This way I could exercise in the comfort of my own home and in my jammies if I so desired. OK, it’s going on the list.

4.       Quit Drinking. Of course “they” mean alcoholic beverages. I’m fairly certain that “they” wouldn’t mean drinking all together! In all honesty, I cannot/will not put this on the list. I know that “they” (the other they) say that we should not drink alcoholic bevs. I will tell you one thing, after a beer or two, I feel almost normal. I try to tell myself that it must be the carbs or something else that makes me feel as though I am not sick anymore. Disclaimer: I am in NO WAY suggesting that anyone begin a regimen of imbibing alcoholic beverages to overcome the symptoms of POTS.

5.       Stop Procrastinating. This does not need to go on my list as I usually do not procrastinate. My motto used to be: “Why do today what you can put off ‘til tomorrow?” However, since being sick, this little tidbit of wisdom has gone out the window. I have to do the things I can do today, because I never know what tomorrow will bring.

6.       Save Money. Again, doesn’t need to go on the list. I don’t spend too much money as I have nowhere to spend it. I don’t drive, so I don’t need gas money. If I don’t drive, there is nowhere to go and hence, no money being spent. I guess I could over spend by buying off the internet, but I am too busy writing this blog to do that! Another one bites the dust…

7.       Go to Church. I would attempt to put this on the list, if it wasn’t for sitting upright for 2+ hours and being around a big crowd and listening to really loud worship music. Don’t get me wrong, I used to go to church every Sunday, loved it, and I do miss it. However, before even being diagnosed I remember sitting in the parking lot telling Big Handsome that I didn’t feel well. He suggested we go home (we only live around the corner, so to speak). I soldiered on, and the whole time I was there I felt like I was going to pass out, hurl or both. Haven’t been back since. I do try to spend time with the Lord and nowhere does it say, I must go to church in order to have a relationship with Him. I think I’ll edit this one to read: I will spend more time with the Lord.

8.       Wake Up Early. Well, this one just makes no sense to me…what for, so I can start feeling crappy earlier??? Half the time, I don’t get to sleep until the wee hours and even then I toss and turn all night in my own sweat. This one’s gotta hit the road.

9.       Stop Cursing. Now this one is just plain funny! Not that I curse all that much, but seriously, even if I were to use another word instead; I would still know what I meant, so why waste the energy? Sometimes a curse word is all I can think of to describe what I’m feeling damn it!

10.   Read the Newspaper. Seriously??? They still print those?? Look, if I wanted to read about everyone else’s problems, I would read the newspaper. Quite frankly, I have enough of my own. I think I’ll edit this one too, to: Read More. This I can handle. I can definitely read more blogs, social networking statuses, forums, medical journal articles and the like.

So 3 out of 10 (with a few edited to suit me)…see what I mean about setting myself up for failure?? I can still try though, and try I will. I cannot/will not promise anything. What is it “they” say: “If you don’t expect anything, you won’t be disappointed?” That’s what I’m going with.

At the very least, I can attempt to evict the dust bunnies, although they will probably just move next door to the bookcases.

Here’s to hoping you all have a much better outcome with your resolutions this coming year!